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Enron Mail |
---------------------- Forwarded by Hector Campos/HOU/ECT on 11/15/2000 09:41
AM --------------------------- Emilio Ayanz <EmilioA@arcassociates.com< on 11/15/2000 06:42:15 AM To: "'Hala'" <hala.tayyarah@enron.com<, "'Tom'" <tbremond@enron.com<, "'Adam'" <Adam.Borgatti@NBFinancial.com<, "'Hector'" <hector.campos@enron.com<, "'Montgomery Jarrett'" <montgomery@jarrett.net< cc: Subject: FW: REVOCATION OF INDEPENDENCE -----Original Message----- From: Henry Spratt Sent: 15 November 2000 12:38 To: Emilio Ayanz; Paul Morgan; Claudio Lohmann Subject: FW: REVOCATION OF INDEPENDENCE -----Original Message----- From: Parker, Chris [mailto:chris.parker@nomura.co.uk] <mailto:[mailto:chris.parker@nomura.co.uk]< Sent: 15 November 2000 12:37 To: 'Chris Wright'; 'Graeme Summers'; 'Henry Spratt'; 'Joe Wicks'; 'Lee Bostock'; 'Matt Osborne'; 'Mike Morrison'; 'Mikey'; 'Shergar'; 'Tom Brand'; 'Stuart Mills' Subject: FW: REVOCATION OF INDEPENDENCE FOR THOSE OF YOU WORKING FOR US COMPANIES!! < -----NOTICE OF REVOCATION OF INDEPENDENCE < To the citizens of the United States of America, < In the light of your failure to elect a President of the USA and thus < to govern yourselves, we hereby give notice of the revocation of your < independence, effective today. < < Her Sovereign Majesty Queen Elizabeth II will resume monarchial duties < over all states, commonwealths and other territories. Except Utah, < which she does not fancy. Your new prime minister (The rt. hon. Tony < Blair, MP for the 97.85% of you who have until now been unaware that < there is a world outside your borders) will appoint a minister for < America without the need for further elections. Congress and the < Senate will be disbanded. A questionnaire will be circulated next year < to determine whether any of you noticed. < < To aid in the transition to a British Crown Dependency, the following < rules are introduced with immediate effect: < < 1. You should look up "revocation" in the Oxford English Dictionary. < Then look up "aluminium". Check the pronunciation guide. You will be < amazed at just how wrongly you have been pronouncing it. Generally, < you should raise your vocabulary to acceptable levels. Look up < "vocabulary". Using the same twenty seven words interspersed with < filler noises such as "like" and "you know" is an unacceptable and < inefficient form of communication. Look up "interspersed". < < 2. There is no such thing as "US English". We will let Microsoft know < on your behalf. < < 3. You should learn to distinguish the English and Australian accents. It < really isn't that hard. < < 4. Hollywood will be required occasionally to cast English actors as < the good guys. < < 5. You should relearn your original national anthem, "God Save The < Queen", but only after fully carrying out task 1. We would not want you < to get confused and give up half way through. < < 6. You should stop playing American "football". There is only < one kind of football. What you refer to as American "football" is not < a very good game. The 2.15% of you who are aware that there is a world < outside your borders may have noticed that no one else plays "American" < football. You will no longer be allowed to play it, and should instead < play proper football. Initially, it would be best if you played with < the girls. It is a difficult game. Those of you brave enough will, in < time, be allowed to play rugby (which is similar to American < "football", but does not involve stopping for a rest every twenty < seconds or wearing full kevlar body armour like nancies). We are < hoping to get together at least a US rugby sevens side by 2005. < < 7. You should declare war on Quebec and France, using nuclear < weapons if they give you any merde. The 98.85% of you who were not < aware that there is a world outside your borders should count yourselves < lucky. The Russians have never been the bad guys. "Merde" is French for < "shit". < < 8. July 4th is no longer a public holiday. November 8th will be a < new national holiday, but only in England. It will be called "Indecisive < Day". < < 9. All American cars are hereby banned. They are crap and it is for < your own good. When we show you German cars, you will understand what we < mean. < < 10. Please tell us who killed JFK. It's been driving us crazy. < < Thank you for your cooperation. < < < < PLEASE READ: The information contained in this e-mail is confidential and intended for the named recipient(s) only. If you are not an intended recipient of this email you must not copy, distribute or take any further action in reliance on it and you should delete it and notify the sender immediately. Email is not a secure method of communication and Nomura International plc cannot accept responsibility for the accuracy or completeness of this message or any attachment(s). Please check this e-mail for virus infection, for which Nomura International plc accepts no responsibility. If verification of this email is sought then please request a hard copy. Unless otherwise stated any views or opinions presented are solely those of the author and do not represent those of Nomura International plc. This email is intended for informational purposes only and is not a solicitation or offer to buy or sell securities or related financial instruments. Nomura International plc is regulated by the Securities and Futures Authority Limited and is a member of the London Stock Exchange.
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