Fw: The Solution

----- Original Message -----
From: <Barbara_Field@prenhall.com<
To: <jackh@rmdfw.com<
Sent: Friday, October 26, 2001 8:37 AM
Subject: FW: The Solution

<
< Jack;
< I just might qualify for this ---- minus the SPF15 in the moisturizer of
course. Have a great day.
< Barbara
<
<
< Subject: The Solution
<
< Take all American women who are within five years of menopause -train
< us
< for a few weeks, outfit us with automatic weapons, grenades, gas masks,
< moisturizer with SPF15, Prozac, hormones, chocolate, and canned tuna -
< drop us (parachuted, preferably) across the landscape of Afghanistan, and
< let us do what comes naturally.
< Think about it. Our anger quotient alone, even when doing standard
< stuff like grocery shopping and paying bills, is formidable enough to
make
< even
< armed men in turbans tremble.
< We've had our children, we would gladly suffer or die to protect
them
< and their future. We'd like to get away from our husbands, if they
haven't
< left
< already. And for those of us who are single, the prospect of finding a
< good
< man with whom to share life is about as likely as being struck by
< lightning. We have nothing to lose. We've survived the water diet,the
< protein diet, the carbohydrate diet, and the grapefruit diet in gyms and
< saunas across America and never lost a pound. We can easily survive
months
< in
< the hostile terrain of Afghanistan with no food at all!
< We've spent years tracking down our husbands or lovers in bars,
< hardware stores, or sporting events...finding bin Laden in some cave will
< be
< no problem.
< Uniting all the warring tribes of Afghanistan in a new government?
< Oh, please ... we've planned the seating arrangements for in-laws and
< extended
< families at Thanksgiving dinners for years ... we understand tribal
< warfare.
< Between us, we've divorced enough husbands to know every trick there
< is for how they hide, launder, or cover up bank accounts and money
< sources.
< We know how to find that money and we know how to seize it ... with or
< without the government's help!
< Let us go and fight. The Taliban hates women. Imagine their terror
as
< we crawl like ants with hot-flashes over their godforsaken terrain. I'm
< going to write my Congresswoman. You should, too!
<
<