FW: Women Power

Normally I resist these but if you haven't seen this one it was just too
good to pass up.

< < Subject: Woman Power
< <
< < Take all American women who are within five years of
< < menopause - train us for a few weeks, outfit us with
< < automatic weapons, grenades, gas masks, moisturizer
< < with SPF15, Prozac, hormones, chocolate, and canned
< < tuna - < < drop us (parachuted, preferably) across the landscape
< < of Afghanistan, and let us do what comes naturally.
< <
< < Think about it. Our anger quotient alone, even when
< < doing standard stuff like grocery shopping and paying
< < bills, is formidable enough to make even armed men in
< < turbans tremble.
< <
< < We've had our children, we would gladly suffer or die
< < to protect them and their future. We'd like to get
< < away from our husbands, if they haven't left already.
< < And for those of us who are single, the prospect of
< < finding a good man with whom to share life is about as likely as
< < being struck by lightning. We have nothing to lose.
< < We've survived the water diet, the protein diet, the
< < carbohydrate diet, and the grapefruit diet in gyms and
< < saunas across America and never lost a pound. We can
< < easily survive months in the hostile terrain of
< < Afghanistan with no food at all!
< <
< < We've spent years tracking down our husbands or lovers
< < in bars, hardware stores, or sporting events...finding
< < bin Laden in some cave will be no problem.
< <
< < Uniting all the warring tribes of Afghanistan in a new
< < government? Oh, please ... we've planned the seating
< < arrangements for in-laws and extended families at
< < Thanksgiving dinners for years ... we understand
< < tribal warfare.
< <
< < Between us, we've divorced enough husbands to know
< < every trick there is for how they hide, launder, or
< < cover up bank accounts and money sources. We know how
< < to find that money and we know how to seize it ...
< < with or without the government's help!
< <
< < Let us go and fight. The Taliban hates women. Imagine
< < their terror as we crawl like ants with hot-flashes
< < over their godforsaken terrain. I'm going to write my
< < Congresswoman. You should, too!
< <
< <
< <