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Enron Mail |
One day, while walking down the street, a highly successful lawyer was
tragically hit by a bus and killed. His soul arrived up in Heaven, where he was met at the Pearly Gates by St. Peter himself. "Welcome to Heaven," said St. Peter. "Before you get settled in, though, it seems we have a problem. You see, we've never once had a lawyer make it this far and we're not really sure what to do with you." "No problem-just let me in," said the lawyer "Well, I'd like to, but I have higher orders. What we're going to do is let you have a day in Hell and a day in Heaven, and then you can choose whichever one you want to spend an eternity in." "Actually, I think I've made up my mind...I prefer to stay in Heaven," said the lawyer "Sorry, we have rules," said St. Peter, and with that, he put the lawyer in an elevator and it went down-down-down to Hell. The doors opened and the lawyer found himself stepping out onto the putting green on a beautiful golf course. In the distance was a country club, and standing in front of him were all of his friends and fellow lawyers with whom he had worked. They were all dressed in black tie and evening gowns and cheering for him. They ran up and kissed him on both cheeks and they talked about old times. They played an excellent round of golf, and that night went to the country club where he enjoyed an excellent steak and lobster dinner. The lawyer even got to meet the Devil, who was actually a woman and very good looking. He had a great time telling jokes and dancing. In fact, the lawyer was having such a good time, that before he knew it, it was time to leave. Everybody shook his hand, thanked him for coming and waved goodbye as he got on the elevator. The elevator went up-up-up and opened back at the Pearly Gates, where he found St. Peter waiting for him. "Now it's time to spend a day in Heaven," he said. So the lawyer spent the next 24 hours lounging around on clouds and playing the harp and singing. He had a great time, and before he knew it, his 24 hours were up. St. Peter came and got him. "So, you've spent a day in Hell and you've spent a day in Heaven. Now you must choose your eternity," he said. The lawyer paused for a second, and then replied, "Well, I never thought I'd say this. I mean, Heaven has been really great and all, but I think I had a better time in Hell." So St. Peter escorted him to the elevator and again he went down-down-down, back to Hell. When the doors of the elevator opened, the lawyer found himself standing in a desolate wasteland covered in garbage and filth. He saw his friends and fellow lawyers were dressed in rags and were picking up the garbage and putting it in sacks. The Devil appeared before the lawyer. She now had horns sticking out of her head, fire spit out her ears and nose and she had a very evil laugh The lawyer stammered: "I don't understand. Yesterday, I was here and there was a golf course and a country club and we ate lobster and danced and had a great time. Now all there is a wasteland of garbage and all of my friends and fellow lawyers look overworked and miserable." The Devil looked at the lawyer and smiled. "Yesterday we were recruiting you; today you're ours." << (Life in the Law Firm) << << << << << << << <
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